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Monday, June 8, 2009

First Day

Around my house we have a pretty constant battle about who gets to go first (or be first, or eat first, or - really - just about anything "first.")

After the millionth argument one day about who was going to be first, I finally had an epiphany. There had to be a solution to this constant bickering. Indeed, I was right.

So was born "First" day. Each day would be somebody's first day. All I had to do was institute this new policy.

I started by explaining to Randall what I was going to be doing. After all, if a new policy has any chance of being successful, everybody has to be in on the game plan. Together we decided that we would use an odd / even alternation. Kira's birthday is on an even day and Marisa's is on an odd day so this was a logical option.

After we worked out the details, we told the girls what we were doing. I took a bit of time to explain our method and what this new policy would mean.

Now, instead of "Me first! Me first!" I get to listen in on the endless discussions about who's first day it happens to be. At least they no longer argue over it.

Oh, they still argue. I couldn't possibly be lucky enough for the arguing to stop completely. But at least we've settled the "first" issue.


The Mother said...

So instead of arguing about who gets to go first, they argue about who's turn it is to go first?


Mom said...


No. No.

They don't argue about who's turn it is to go first.

They remind me throughout the day - and each other - whose first day it is. It's more of a friendly kind of discussion.

Kira actually reminds me when it's Risa's 'first' day, too - not just her own.

They're heavily involved in keeping track of the system.

Now they argue about who gets which toy - or other such nonsense...

Petula said...

That's a good strategy. Hmmm?? Wonder how I can use that to solve some of the arguments around here?

Crista said...

Hmm, any ideas how to use that/divvy it up with 4 kids? LOL

Karen, author of "My Funny Dad, Harry" said...

What a great idea! I'm assuming you only have the two kids.

A. nony mouse said...

It should work with any number of kids - just rotate who is "first."

Example for 4 kids:

Day 1:
Bob is first
Mary is second
Jane is third
Rufus is fourth

Day 2:
Mary is first
Jane is second
Rufus is third
Bob is fourth

Day 3:
Jane is first
Rufus is second
Bob is third
Mary is fourth

and so on...

Mom said...

To Karen

I have four kids. I have a 3 yr old, a 4 yr old, a 14 yr old and a 19 yr old.

I only use this policy for the two little ones, though.

Mom said...

To Mouse

Thank you for saving me the typing.

John | English Wilderness said...

I wonder how long it will take them to realise there's 7 more odd days in a year than even days :-)

Lots of cool days are odd days too, Christmas day, Halloween, New Year's Eve :-) It's a shame I was born on a even day :-(

A. nony mouse said...

I am hoping that they will be old enough that "first day" will be ancient history when they catch on to that little factoid.

April said...

Good idea

Our biggest fight has to do with when we walk to school. My daughter who likes to walk at a slow pace is constantly complaining because her brother (who likes to run) Has to be first all the time. She can never be in front.

Lin said...

So does it buy you a few minutes of peace as they figure out what day it is??

Mom said...


They actually wake up KNOWING who's day it is. It's interesting.

This new system has actually solved a lot of minor bickering. They still talk a lot about who gets to go first, but there's no longer any argument when I dole out food or drinks or choosing movies. Whatever it is, they now understand that the person who gets to go first is decided based on the day. With that, they also understand that there's no favoritism. That seems to be the biggest catalyst for issues in my house right now. The 4 yr old is very concerned that somebody other than her might get more attention, food, time, etc. With this system, there's no choosing one over the other. It's just an equal system of regulating the decisions.

Artist Victoria O'Neill said...

hi there, really enjoying reading your blog, your insights, etc.....keep it up!

Lynne said...

What a fabulous idea! Great ideas do tend to come out of desperation and it sounds like you solved the arguing issue (at least for this subject) and brought a little bit of piece, excellent job!