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Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Am I Beautiful, Mom?

My four year old has discovered the bathroom mirror.

This morning, as I was brushing my own hair, Kira decided that she needed to see in the mirror and brush her own hair. After a moment, she looked at me across the mirror and asked, "Am I beautiful, Mommy?"


I looked at her and told her that of course she was beautiful - which she is. Then I told her that she was also very smart and very kind and gentle. I made it a point to focus on her other positive traits at this moment when she decided that beauty must surely matter.

I think it is incredibly important that children learn early that outward physical beauty is not the most important attribute that a person can have. Beauty has so many different incarnations, and children should understand that other positive attributes are greatly valued.

In this new phase of discovering beauty, Kira has also discovered fashion. There are now clothes that she refuses to wear because they are ugly. She has developed her very own personal taste in clothing. Lucky for me, she seems to have good taste - for now.

**It should be noted that Kira is only 4 yrs old and is nowhere near her teenage years. In a few years I will be reminding myself of my own good wisdom by reviewing these pages frequently and thoroughly.


Michelle said...

What a wonderful way to explain beauty to your 4 year old. I'm always telling my 4 year old how wonderful she is, inside and out. I've noticed lately that she has also developed her own sense of fashion too. It's really fun watching her. Thanks for sharing.

Nicole Feliciano said...

Lovely post. I have an almost 4-year-old daughter. She hasn't muttered the ugly word yet. I'm sure it is coming. sigh.

Petula said...

I think that is good insight for all of us to remember when posed with something children say that isn't "important." Great job! :)

Liss said...

What a wonderful world it would be when more people teach their children the importance of true beauty.

Melissa said...

Yes, that topic of "beauty" with your daughter is certainly a difficult one. My oldest, 14, doesn't think she is pretty (she is!!)... and I often wonder if I didn't tell her enough when she was little - I always told focused on other things..... I have made a point to tell our youngest daughter how beautiful she is (inside and out), and I do tell our oldest, too. *sigh* This parenting thing is very difficult, lol!

Randall said...

Of course, Kira has told me that a broken bird house is "very beautiful," and she likes to point things out and ask if I think they are beautiful. So I think she is still trying to figure out exactly what the word really means. Your answer was just right, I think.

Love you

Mel Avila Alarilla said...

Your child is a growing princess out to discover the world. It is the age of discoveries and questions in life and the answers make for the foundation of her life in the future. Treasure these moments in both your lives. You will reminisce on them when they grow older and live their own lives. Thanks for the post. God bless you always.

BK said...

My niece is 5 and she likes to choose what to wear too. What is worse, her two twin brothers who are only 3 start choosing what they want to wear from the age of 2.